did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
