She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
