dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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