We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize