belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Nicole vs. Life
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
