you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
