i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
