I wannas sexs uuuuu
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize