I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
