Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
She's the barista slut.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
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