ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Randomize
