So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
