it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Randomize
