sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
