I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
