There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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