I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
