I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
