Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
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