just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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