just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Randomize
