1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Randomize
