After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Randomize
