therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize