No subtext here. People are naked.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
