so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
i think im in europe. pls send help
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
