Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Randomize
