im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
he just fucked me for my cheese..
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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