yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
