I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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