at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
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