Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Randomize
