Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
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