i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
