Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Randomize
