I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
