: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
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