at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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