My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize