So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
