'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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