The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
