lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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