Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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