4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Randomize