She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
