I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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