Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
