i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Randomize
