i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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