you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
